3 Ways to Spend $1,000,000: Dragons, Warriors, and more

What can you do with a $1,000,000 besides buy a house, a new car, and a college education for your child? After this point the list begins to run dry for some prospective millionaires, but I am here to enliven your imagination a bit.  Here are three things you could spend a million dollars on:

Artisan Dragon Hedges $30,000

Scarecrows are out of vogue. And who’s scared of them anymore? A giant dragon hedge, however . . . now that will scare away more than just crows. You won’t have to worry about sparrows, crusading knights, OR invading armies. No real millionaire fantasy is complete without one of these. In fact a garden without one looks empty and dull.

 

Hover Scooter $13,000

Who still walks? Certainly not a millionaire with any self-worth. Right now, everybody who’s anybody, all the fashionable millionaires, travel by hover scooter. Getting from point A to point B in a stylish way now only costs $13,000! Warning: You may look slightly goofy while riding it.

A Terracotta Soldier $765,000

If your artisan dragon hedges don’t do the trick of scaring people away, then this ancient warrior sworn to protect its master will. This is the most loyal guardian a millionaire could ask for, it will even stay dedicated to your service beyond the grave. Also, it is a nice antique piece for any collection of ancient statues. 

 Interested by these fantastic items? Obtain them now and find more like them at Butlr.com, the Internet's first Fantasy Millionaire Game. 

Tax Day & a Hot Air Balloon Ship

 Today in Butlr we examine the life of King Johnson P. Malone again. This time we catch him on tax day. He collects his dues from the other lords and millionaires of Butlr and even obtains a hot air balloon ship along the way  . . . .

Well it was that time of year again– yes, tax day. I woke up bright and early and rolled out of my gold-laced bed. Butlr Bot brought up some fried eggs, roast duck, creamed spinach, and a Bellini champagne for breakfast. I looked in the mirror as Butlr Bot dressed me. “It’s tax day, my good sir,” he said as he carefully laid my crown on my head. I replied, “It’s good to be king, Butlr.”

            My chauffeur drove me slowly through the town in my convertible Bugatti Veyron. Crowds flanked us on either side as we made our way through the town. The first person we were to call on was Duke Moly. We came outside the gates of his house. His private security force quickly recognized me and opened the solid gold gates for our car. Duke Moly was outside waiting for us. He seemed nervous.

            He yelled out, “King Malone, how do you do? I–“

            “Where’s the money, Duke Moly? I want my taxes!”

            He seemed embarrassed and after a little encounter he admitted that he had collected taxes for his land but did not have them for me. Why not you may ask? Well, he told me he had spent them all to buy a giant hot air balloon ship. He was actually millions of dollars into debt. I am a fair and understanding king and we came to a compromise. I left Duke Moly’s estate comfortably seated in my new hot air balloon ship as my chauffeur piloted in the direction of the Oshida estate.

            Now, Marquis Oshida is an odd breed of lord. His estate is characterized by the large herds of Big Game animals he has roaming it and the various celebrities that frequent it. When I arrived, Marquis Oshida was in a large Crane operating a wrecking ball, destroying a house. He had bought the small house and had it flown over to his estate. We brought the air balloon ship down, paying special attention as to dodge the swinging wrecking ball.

            “Marquis Oshida! You know what time of year it is don’t you?” I yelled.

            He got out of his crane, taking off his safety goggles and hardhat and looked at me.

            “Yes, yes, my good king. I was especially harsh and exact in collecting my taxes this year from the peasants and lower aristocracy. Here is what I owe you . . .  Now do you want that in gold bars or shillings?”

            I left that day with fat pockets. What will I do with the money? Well I’ve taken a particular liking to opera recently, maybe I will build an opera house . . . .

            Yes, life as King is good. 

Join the Butlr Aristocracy today and sketch out your millionaire fantasy today.

Exotic animals dealer

The following is a personal anecdote from Johnson Malone, a powerful and well-respected King in Butlr. I, his lowly mechanical manservant, his 'robotic butler' has taken the liberty of transcribing it for him and publishing it on the net for his various admirers to read. It is a glimpse into the life of a royalty– rich, famous, and living the dream.

I woke up this morning to the gentle chirping of my Micronesian Kingfisher birds outside my window. I bought them yesterday for a hefty price from a rare and exotic animals dealer named Girabaldi. He was a funny, mustached man who specializes in exotic birds. Normally he doesn’t make house calls, especially to private islands, but he made an exception for me when I offered to fly him over in my new RAH-66 Comanche helicopter.

You know, rare animal dealers are an odd breed. When speaking with Girabaldi I couldn’t help but imagine what it would be like to deal in the rare and exotic animals. It’s funny, I began to think of the odd requests he must get and the all the bizarre locations he must go to gather up his inventory. During the conversation he mentioned trips to Ecuador, Brazil, and Somalia to capture specific species of birds. It was hard to imagine this little mustached fellow tramping through rainforests and jungle, tracking down rare birds. Anyways, it all made me think maybe I’d like to try my hand at rare animal dealing. I asked (my) Butlr Bot what he thought of it the idea; he told me it was easily possible and booked me a trip to the Brazilian rainforests and hired a group of world renown poachers to help me track, capture, (but not kill!) the rare animals I desire. I think first I will go for a Capuchin Monkey . . . 

-Johnson P. Malone (King in Butlr) 

Sketch out your own millionaire fantasy. Join the Butlr aristocracy now